059. Someone to smile for

It's been awhile since I could truly say that I have someone in my life that I can wake up, think about and smile. When Nick and I lost friendship, I thought it would be awhile until someone would replace that hole that he had made in my life. This weekend made me realize that that hole that Nick made, shouldn't have even been there in the first place. I have so many things in my life that I can think about and smile for, that it's ridiculous. Redline, for one, keeps me freaking sane. I would not survive without it. Granted, I'm getting a little burnt out and need a serious break, but I love what I do. I can't complain. At the show this weekend, I hung out with the person who makes me smile the most, Ross. Every time I'm sad, every time I'm upset and don't know what to do, Ross is the one to talk me through a situation. He makes me smile when I'm crying, and when I'm already happy. He's the most talented, driven mallet percussionist I've ever met through WGI. I feel like some days, I drive to Michigan for Redline, through the heavy traffic, through the terrible winter storms and horrible Michigan drivers, because I know the end result will be that I get to see him at NCA/Redline competitions. At the end of the day, he's been there for me since we met. That's all I ever really needed.

Thank you :)

59/365

058. Almost missed.

Yeah, blog post of the day.

58/365

057. Progresssssss

It just dawned on me this morning, I have a wonderful new life. I saw old roommate on the way to breakfast with my group of friends, and I realized that for the first time since being at BGSU, I have a group of friends who really like me for who I am. They don't judge, they aren't pity friends. It's wonderful. And there she is, alone. Not liking BGSU. You get what you give. In her case, she gets nothing out of this experience because she didn't give anything.

Live lessons are wonderful to learn.

57/365

056. Cried like a baby.

If you're going to watch this, be prepared to bawl your eyes out. Legit. I cried like a baby watching this. My best friend; my Maggie. I relate so much to this guy and his dog. I miss my dog right now. I'm terrified I'm going to come home from BGSU and she's going to be gone. I grew up with her. She was my best friend and I was hers. I put up with all her black fur because she knew me better than I knew myself. I'm brought to tears to even think about life without her. I always told myself that I won't live without her, and it's true. When her time comes, so will mine.

56/365

055. Internet in GSW...

wow. that's a first. i'm slackin' today, heather. i dont have anything else to say.


55/365

054. Something broke inside of you.

So, I woke up about 30 minute ago. Beautiful. I only have one class today.... sociology :( boring! so, i'll go to that class, go to the union and get a new key-lanyard, eat, do laundry, be productive, have dinner with Sarah after 530 and call it a day. Yesss. And, I don't have anything to say, so Heather, I'm not slacking :)

54/365

053. stop and think a second.

these weekends really pay a toll on my soul. i was not a fan of driving home yesterday. i wish i could be home for longer than a day. i miss my parents. i miss my dog. i miss my friends back in dayton. i'm not complaining though. i have the best friends at bowling green and at redline. i just wish i wasn't tempted by redline being in dayton. i want to be in dayton for more than just a day. redline gets in the way of having a winter break, having a fall break. not spring break. i will be home to hang with my family in three weeks. i cannot wait.

53/365

052. I'm back.

Back in BG! Woo, this weekend was wonderful. Thank you redline :)

52/365

051. second.

redrine got second. yeeah. wooo.
kbye.

51/365

050. Lost, but recovered.

I'm sitting at home right now!! Wonderful! Last night, I lost my wallet. I went to Walmart to pick up stuff for Redline this weekend. I must have dropped it in the parking lot, because I couldn't find it. This morning, I get a facebook message from a lady who found it. I met her a Meijer to pick it up. Humanity is still alright in my book. Nothing was stolen, nothing was taken. I'm just waiting for my new debit card to show up.

I'm going to go chill with my dog. Bye :)

50/365

049. Let's go.

One more day until I get to go home, wonderful.

49/365

048. Queen Bee.

I no longer have to live with the QueenBee Bitch. Yes, I moved. Thankfully. It happened last night. I made it official today. I have a new key, and the psycho bitch is left to be alone. No more of her bull-shit. It's absolutely glorious. My new roommate is a band kid. She's a musical theatre major, which means she understands what I live for. She won't mock my interests and hobbies, like bitch did. I'm going to go get food with Jordan now.

have a wonderful day

48/365

047. Come undone at the seams.

I woke up thinking, "This is going to be a brilliant day." Well, god damnit. I'm going to make it a wonderful day. Hopefully one of the last days I have to wake up in McDonald East 122. Hopefully sometime soon I'll be in McDonald East 358. That'd be absolutely wonderful. This girl really doesn't know how much she's saving my life. She doesn't know how much happier I'm going to be. She doesn't know what a wonderful thing she is doing. If I can set myself up in a situation with a new roommate, one who doesn't judge without getting the other side of the story, Bowling Green will be my new favorite school. I hate it here because I have to live with this girl who thinks I'm "fuckin nasty" (details later of course!). That's literally why I've hated it here. Everyone asks me why I came here if I hated it. I didn't know that my roommate would be someone who judges without background information and has to gossip behind my back. Had I known that, I wouldn't have showed up here. I wouldn't have done it. But, I guess we wins some and you lose some. In my case, I learn and I live. This little pothole turned out to give me a flat tire. I've almost got a new tire on, and I'm ready to keep going. Today is going to be wonderful. I hope everyone has a wonderful day, because I'm going to

It's almost Friday, smile!
47/365

046. And i can't get it out of my head.

I need something inspiring to say, or to think. Because, as Pat said yesterday, my blog is really boring all of a sudden. I've fallen into a hole and I need a ladder to get out. My only ladder I can think of is Redline.

The person who pushed me in this hole will remain anonymous. But, I want to say that I wish every single person could not judge on first site. That every person walking the earth was tolerant, and understanding of situations. I wish everyone could ask for the other side of the story; there are always two sides of the story. You say I chose to do it, I didn't know it was going to happen. Two sides of the street to walk on. I wish we could all just be civil to each other. Nobody had to be a bully, to say mean things behind someone's back just to make themselves feel better. I wish the world outside of high school felt like the world outside of high school. I wish that the world actually had evolved from prior situations. That people wouldn't treat similar situations the same, because the context is always different. I wish people wouldn't make fun of others for their hobbies or things they find delight in. I wish the real world was really a wonderful place all the time. I wish Redline was the real world. I wish I could move to Michigan State and live in East Lansing. I wish I could hang out with my best friend Rossiepoo Taylor every day, and he could tell me that the night gets darker before dawn, and we could make penguins. We could laugh, and smile. I wish I could pick up everything I own and throw it into Michigan. I have never met people nicer than those I've met while being in Michigan. I've never hated my own state as much as I currently do. I have never hated my own situational state as much as I do now. I deserve better. We all deserve better. Nobody should have to live in a state of hate.

Have a good day guys. It's gunna be Friday soon!
46/ 365

045. I had something.

I had something really important to say. I was real inspired. But then I realized that I'm stuck in BGSU, living in a room with a person who thinks that I'm a stupid bitch and that I'm "fuckin' nasty". And then the inspiration was gone. Oh well. I'll get the inspiration back when I'm living somewhere nice.

45/ 365

044. Imma be.

Redrine won the Troy WGI regional :) 84.05!

44/365

043. Sicker than assumptions.

In bed. Going to redrine tomorrrowww.

43/365

042. Hello,

stomach flu. I won't be at redrine :(


42/365

041. Focus

Focus was tonight. That's really all that happened. BGSU didn't close :(


41/365

040. Phineas + Ferb.

I've been watching phineas and ferb all day. i feel like they've been on summer vacation way too long. i want summer so bad. it's snowing really bad here. like 12 inches. oh well. hopefully no school tomorrow? my only class was cancelled today. :)

40/365

039. Normalcy.

I would really like some normalcy in my life. The "snow apocalypse" is coming. By Wednesday, we're supposed to have 12+ inches of snow! that's really all I have to say for today. I have to go get ice cream. K bye!


39/365

038. Foux du Fafa

I wrote this for my Pop Culture class, but I don't feel like writing anything. It's an editorial about what Drumline the movie does for people's perspectives + Redline. Ok, great.

“Hhhhrredline Percussion from Canton, Michigan, you may take the floor for Winter Guard International World Championships finals competition!” I am a performer. I am musician. I am a member of the fifth best drumline in the world, Redline Percussion. I am a part of a family of performers, musicians and friends. I am in love with an activity that nobody knows exists. I have never been more in love with an activity and group of people than I am now. I am willing to drive 2+ hours to Hartland, Michigan every single weekend for these people and this group. I don’t know where I’m going to spend the night before I arrive. I’m paying $975.00 plus gas and food money to be with these people and potentially win the World Championships in April. I am at home when I am standing behind my vibraphone at Round Elementary in Hartland, Michigan at 7pm on a Friday night. What do people think of when they hear “drumline”? They think of Nick Cannon from Drumline. They think of a ten person snare-line who has problems with each other. They think of a drumline who are out to over-do one another and stand out. Teamwork makes the dream work. The ensembles that I’ve been in have been family. They think of a boy who can’t read music but got a full-ride to a college. The members of drumline are musicians- musicians have to be able to read music. They think of a band whose motto is “one band, one sound” but act against that motto. There is more than one sound coming from that band. The movie Drumline suggest that marching bands and winter percussion ensembles are sloppy; that the performers are not striving for perfection- the marching lines are not straight and the music is not clean. The ensembles that I have been a part of strive for nothing less than perfection. The lines that I’ve competed with have done the same. Drumline is an art-form. It is more than just marching around on a field while hitting a drum with sticks. Drumline suggests that different marching bands and winter percussion ensembles cannot be friends with one another. I beg to differ. Through Bands of America (BOA) and Winter Guard International, WGI, I have met the most wonderful people. My best friend played snare drum for a drumline from California. I have friends from Tennessee, Indiana, Massachusetts, Georgia, and Pennsylvania and of course, Michigan and other parts of Ohio. Yes, there is rivalry involved, but it’s not to the extent that Drumline portrays.
When I think of “drumline”, I think of my best friends. I think of driving home on a Sunday afternoon when it’s snowing like none-other. I think of Saturday nights in South Lyon, Michigan. I think of unloading and loading the semi-truck in an hour. I think of getting lost in Michigan on a daily basis. I think of “Oh, herrrooo!” from the entire front ensemble and I smile. I think of changing every “l” to “r” because of the Redline staff. I think of “Foux du Fafa” while driving to Subway for lunch every Saturday. I think of playing Ben Folds songs in the portable outside the gym. I think of The Common Man, Redline Percussion’s 2010 show. I think of leaving Bowling Green State University at 5pm just to make it to Michigan on time. I think about my vibraphone section- the most diverse group of people. I think of the memories I have already made with the Redline front ensemble and the memories to come. The season isn’t even half over. Sometimes, I forget that I live in Ohio when my heart and home is in Michigan. I define myself by the activity I love to do. I think of something that I want to be a part of until I die.

037. Hello, how are you?

81.9 :)


37/365

036. You may take the floor in competition.

Imma be on the next level
Imma be rockin over that bass treble.


First redline show of the 2010 season. . . . GET IT BITCHES.

that is all

36/365

035. I can't do this anymore.

I'm going take today to stress how happy I really am. For the longest time, I was having a hard time figuring out what "home" meant to me. I now finally realize what it is to me. Home is something indescribable. Home is the place that you smile without thinking about it. Home is really where the heart is. The first place that I have felt home at is Round Elementary with Redline. I haven't felt at home since I left Centerville. I can't even explain how much Redline has done for me. People who understand me, who don't think I'm completely weird. People who I could sit + gossip with all day if need be. I've made friends with people who have made an impact on my life. These people really have changed my life. I am so thankful to be a member of Redline MMX. I wish the people at Bowling Green would give me enough time to actually show what I am. The people at Redline are willing to get to know me; why aren't the BG kids? Because there's something different about the people I play band with, even at Centerville. There's something different. I don't know. I'm going to go avoid the plague that's growing in my room. I hope I can not get sick. That'd be awesome. I'm so excited for Redrines first show at Ferndale :)

35/365

034. Rude Awakening

This morning I got a phone call from a lady who I'm supposed to be talking to about getting a job. I sounded like a retard, because her phone call woke me up. I hate first impressions. Since this morning, I've been in a daze, not able to wake up. You could say it was a long day. I had class from 1030 to 220, a meeting at 315, class from 430 to 545, sociology study group from 6-7pm + then FOCUS from 730-830pm. Crazy day. To top it all off, roommate has the stomach flu + keeps puking. Great. Another sleepless night.


Oh college.
34/365

033. Pokerface

I'm currently up at the sharks club, working the Redline fundraiser. This location is wonderful- there's wireless, and it's easy to find. This is seriously the best thing ever. Andrea is working this fundraiser with me tonight. We go until 1015, when JWebb + Brent come and take over. Then I'll drive myself back down to Bowling Green until friday @ 5, when i'll drive back up here. I am such a dedicated person.


33/365

032. You were drunk + tried to take a mental picture with your hands.

Hi, hello. So, it's the first day of FEBRUARY! I made it through an entire month of project 365!! January was a crazy month, and I can personally say that I'm so glad it's overrrrr. January was a month of fighting, a month of driving, a month of crazy peculiar lack of communication. January, I'm glad you're history. On to February + My half birthday!! First Redline competition in 6 days! I cannot wait. I'm so excited to be a member of Redline. I got my Redline jacket yesterday. . . . I'm in love. So much better then the high school drumline jacket. For real. Alright, awesome

this has been fun, but secret life + make it or break it is on tonight.